At certain times in their life, adolescents may feel the need to create a personality for themselves, to assert themselves and to identify with a specific category of people.

The proof is that in the majority of our high schools and colleges there are groups that we will call “clans”. These are sometimes ethnic groups and sometimes not; if not groups generally made up of people with identical temperaments, the same habits and attitudes, the same tastes.

Here we find ourselves at a time in the adolescent’s life where he is permeable to all kinds of influence, or his desire to belong to a group to identify with is growing.

Belonging to a clan in himself is not a bad initiative because it is always important to feel loved and surrounded, but choosing “The Group” to associate with is the most critical and important thing.  Consequently, attending school peers, whether or not motivated by school, necessarily conditions the child’s attitude towards his studies and therefore influences his success.

Several factors can guide adolescents’ social choices and determine how their friends can influence them:

  • The need to belong to a group;
  • The desire to be assertive for those with low self-esteem and questionable confidence in their abilities;
  • The presence or lack of supervision and family support;
  • The healthy or pernicious need to belong (at all costs).

In such situations, the family is the answer because children who crave group membership are usually lacking in attention and love from their families.

– Give them the necessary virtues allowing them to select well the people frequentable in               their own interest.

– Provide them with positive role models they can relate to.

– Help them to recognize their true worth and to define them as well as to set limits.

– Do not demean them with insults or hurtful words, avoid making the family home a battleground or a battlefield where the child feels uncomfortable.

– Encourage him to participate in school and extracurricular activities that promote self-esteem.


For more information, advice, or clarification regarding the choice of your future studies, do not hesitate to contact us at 651 320 573.